Struggling Lower-Class Still Unsure How Best To Fuck Selves With Vote
WASHINGTON—As election day nears, millions of the nation's poorest voters have reportedly yet to settle on the most profound and enduring way to completely fuck themselves over when they head to the polls this year.
"On the one hand, I'm pretty sure Barack Obama will undermine my best interests by maintaining the same centrist, pro-corporate policies of previous Democratic administrations," said Jim Estey, 34, a recently laid-off assembly-line worker. "Conversely, I agree with McCain and Palin on abortion, which might just balance out the fact that they'll further marginalize people like me by supporting deregulation and slashing social programs. So it's pretty much a toss-up at this point."
From The Onion (issue 44.44, by the way...)
Friday, October 31, 2008
World’s worst boxer throws in the towel after 256 defeats
The world’s worst boxer has finally thrown in the towel after 256 defeats.
Peter Buckley, 39, has lost more fights than any other boxer and says that his next, number 300, will be his last.
‘I’ve had my eye on the 300 mark for a while, and it’s a little milestone I want to achieve, but I don’t want to fight on,' he said.
‘People keep saying to me that I’ll get a call in a few weeks’ time offering me a fight and I’ll say yes, but I mean it when I say this is it.'
Despite his losing streak, Buckley has sparred with several impressive opponents including 42 future British, Commonwealth, European or World champions, such as Duke McKenzie, Scott Harrison, Naseem Hamed, Michael Brodie, Gavin Rees and Colin McMillian.
From The Daily Mail
"You haven't lost when you get knocked out... you've only lost when you're too afraid to get back in the ring. All respect to you Peter, for going back time and time again." - a comment posted on the article. Amen.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
Anyone, any time, anywhere: Famous People Who Have Been Homeless
Every day, we walk past people in the streets without having the slightest clue that they are homeless because they do not fit the stereotypical image. Even of those that do fit the common-held image, you simply cannot tell by looking at them what past contribution to society they may have made or what contribution they may be capable of producing in the future. You never know what value or talent could be concealed behind the grubby faced facade.
The following persons have all experienced homelessness at some point in their lives. Some only briefly and some for many years. Some have risen to fame from poverty while others have declined from wealth to destitution. Some possess extreme intelligence, others artistic talent but all have made positive contribution.
John Drew Barrymore
Actor; father of actress Drew Barrymore spent many years living on the streets and in shelters, becoming more and more reclusive and eventually disappearing into the wilderness maintaining very little contact with friends and family.
Jim Carrey
Actor, writer, producer and comedian lived out of a VW van in various locations across Canada with older brother John Carrey, older sister Rita Carrey, and parents Percy Carrey and Kathleen Carrey. Also camped in a tent with his family in the backyard of the home of his older married sister, Patricia.
Ella Fitzgerald
Ella spent years as a struggling, homeless teenager before she was discovered in a singing competition. In 1932, her mother died from a heart attack. She was taken in by her aunt, Virginia. Shortly afterward her sister’s guardian also died of a heart attack and Frances joined Ella at Virginia’s home in New York City.
Following these traumas, Fitzgerald’s grades dropped dramatically, and she frequently skipped school. At one point, she worked as a lookout at a bordello and also with a Mafia-affiliated numbers runner. After getting into trouble with the police, she was taken into custody and sent to a reform school. Eventually she escaped from the reformatory, and became homeless.
More here
The following persons have all experienced homelessness at some point in their lives. Some only briefly and some for many years. Some have risen to fame from poverty while others have declined from wealth to destitution. Some possess extreme intelligence, others artistic talent but all have made positive contribution.
John Drew Barrymore
Actor; father of actress Drew Barrymore spent many years living on the streets and in shelters, becoming more and more reclusive and eventually disappearing into the wilderness maintaining very little contact with friends and family.
Jim Carrey
Actor, writer, producer and comedian lived out of a VW van in various locations across Canada with older brother John Carrey, older sister Rita Carrey, and parents Percy Carrey and Kathleen Carrey. Also camped in a tent with his family in the backyard of the home of his older married sister, Patricia.
Ella Fitzgerald
Ella spent years as a struggling, homeless teenager before she was discovered in a singing competition. In 1932, her mother died from a heart attack. She was taken in by her aunt, Virginia. Shortly afterward her sister’s guardian also died of a heart attack and Frances joined Ella at Virginia’s home in New York City.
Following these traumas, Fitzgerald’s grades dropped dramatically, and she frequently skipped school. At one point, she worked as a lookout at a bordello and also with a Mafia-affiliated numbers runner. After getting into trouble with the police, she was taken into custody and sent to a reform school. Eventually she escaped from the reformatory, and became homeless.
More here
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Saturday, October 25, 2008
The Lives They Left Behind: Suitcases From a State Hospital Attic
An attic at the Willard Psychiatric Center in Romulus, N.Y., held the histories of former patients.
By PATRICIA COHEN
Published: December 7, 2007
TO a child a forgotten trunk in an attic opens the door to a beguiling fantasy world where a castoff shawl can be transformed into a king’s robe, a superhero’s cape or a genie’s flying carpet.
But the forgotten trunks and suitcases found in an attic at the abandoned Willard Psychiatric Center in the Finger Lakes region of New York represent the opposite: how the door to a desperately desired reality was closed to virtually all its patients.
The 427 suitcases, trunks, crates and bundles recovered after Willard closed in 1995 turned out to belong to patients who had spent decades in this vast state mental institution. In them were the remnants of lives left behind when their owners entered the locked gates.
Now a handful of artifacts once packed away, and the stories behind them, are on display at the New York Public Library’s Science, Industry and Business Library in Midtown through Jan. 31.
From the New York Times
if you need a username / password, use "legion / legion"
The slideshow of the exhibit is here, and it's heartbreaking.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Maple Story? Seriously?
A woman has been arrested in Japan after she allegedly killed her virtual husband in a popular video game.
The 43-year-old was reportedly furious at finding herself suddenly divorced in the online game Maplestory.
Police say she illegally accessed log-in details of the man playing her husband, and killed off his character.
The woman, a piano teacher, is in jail in Sapporo waiting to learn if she faces charges of illegally accessing a computer and manipulating data.
If charged with the offenses, and convicted, she faces up to five years in prison and a fine of up to $5,000.
via BBC News
Maple Story is a 2D, side-scrolling, console-style MMORPG. It's for kids. I played it for about 5 minutes before I just stopped caring.
It's probably the least offensive game in the world. It's like Mario Brothers, for gods sake... I think the sheep sums this story up completely...
The 43-year-old was reportedly furious at finding herself suddenly divorced in the online game Maplestory.
Police say she illegally accessed log-in details of the man playing her husband, and killed off his character.
The woman, a piano teacher, is in jail in Sapporo waiting to learn if she faces charges of illegally accessing a computer and manipulating data.
If charged with the offenses, and convicted, she faces up to five years in prison and a fine of up to $5,000.
via BBC News
Maple Story is a 2D, side-scrolling, console-style MMORPG. It's for kids. I played it for about 5 minutes before I just stopped caring.
It's probably the least offensive game in the world. It's like Mario Brothers, for gods sake... I think the sheep sums this story up completely...
Current celebrity crush object
I had no idea Kristen Wiig was this hot.
And, of course, she's completely insane. Just how I like 'em!
And, of course, she's completely insane. Just how I like 'em!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Tiny, Flightless, Feathered Dino Found in China
Oct. 22, 2008 -- A tiny, egg-robbing dinosaur that lived more than 150 million years ago could help explain a key phase in the evolution of birds, scientists reported on Wednesday.
In unusual language for a high-brow journal, Chinese paleontologists admit the wee dino was, frankly, "bizarre."
From Discovery News
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Conductor over PA: Attention passengers. Acts of pugilism are not allowed on this train.
(two minutes later) Attention passengers. This is just a reminder that acts of fornication or fellatio are not allowed on this train.
--Post Midnight Drunk Train, LIRR
via Overheard in New York
(two minutes later) Attention passengers. This is just a reminder that acts of fornication or fellatio are not allowed on this train.
--Post Midnight Drunk Train, LIRR
via Overheard in New York
Monday, October 20, 2008
In the shadow of horror, SS guardians frolic
just chilling...
WASHINGTON: Last December, Rebecca Erbelding, a young archivist at the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum, opened a letter from a former United States Army intelligence officer who said he wanted to donate photographs of Auschwitz he had found more than 60 years ago in Germany.
Erbelding was intrigued: Although Auschwitz may be the most notorious of the Nazi death camps, there are only a small number of known photos of the place before its liberation in 1945. Some time the next month, the museum received a package containing 16 cardboard pages, with photos pasted on both sides, and their significance quickly became apparent.
As Erbelding and other archivists reviewed the album, they realized they had a scrapbook of sorts of the lives of Auschwitz's senior SS officers that was maintained by Karl Höcker, the adjutant to the camp commandant. Rather than showing the men performing their death camp duties, the photos depicted, among other things, a horde of SS men singing cheerily to the accompaniment of an accordionist, Höcker lighting the camp's Christmas tree, a cadre of young SS women frolicking and officers relaxing, some with tunics shed, for a smoking break.
From the International Herald Tribune
There's a slide show of the pictures in the article, the direct link is here
WASHINGTON: Last December, Rebecca Erbelding, a young archivist at the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum, opened a letter from a former United States Army intelligence officer who said he wanted to donate photographs of Auschwitz he had found more than 60 years ago in Germany.
Erbelding was intrigued: Although Auschwitz may be the most notorious of the Nazi death camps, there are only a small number of known photos of the place before its liberation in 1945. Some time the next month, the museum received a package containing 16 cardboard pages, with photos pasted on both sides, and their significance quickly became apparent.
As Erbelding and other archivists reviewed the album, they realized they had a scrapbook of sorts of the lives of Auschwitz's senior SS officers that was maintained by Karl Höcker, the adjutant to the camp commandant. Rather than showing the men performing their death camp duties, the photos depicted, among other things, a horde of SS men singing cheerily to the accompaniment of an accordionist, Höcker lighting the camp's Christmas tree, a cadre of young SS women frolicking and officers relaxing, some with tunics shed, for a smoking break.
From the International Herald Tribune
There's a slide show of the pictures in the article, the direct link is here
The "fairer sex". yeah.
NYU girl #1: I totally want to push that kid in the water.
NYU girl #2: What? Why?
NYU girl #1: Just to watch him drown.
Little boy: What?
NYU girls #1 and #2 (in unison): Nothing.
--Turtle Pond, Central Park
Via Overheard in New York
NYU girl #2: What? Why?
NYU girl #1: Just to watch him drown.
Little boy: What?
NYU girls #1 and #2 (in unison): Nothing.
--Turtle Pond, Central Park
Via Overheard in New York
Sunday, October 19, 2008
In Little Italy, yeah, probably
Girl: Hang on... (bends over to tie shoe in middle of crowd)
Appalled mother: Don't do that! This is New York. You could get pregnant!
--Mulberry & Hester, Little Italy
Via Overheard in New York
Appalled mother: Don't do that! This is New York. You could get pregnant!
--Mulberry & Hester, Little Italy
Via Overheard in New York
A rare moment of kindness, I'm guessing
Well-dressed bridge & tunnel young girl: I'll have a cosmopolitan.
Bartender: We don't serve cosmos here.
Well-dressed bridge & tunnel young girl: Fine, I'll have a gin and tonic.
Bartender: We've got two types of beer. Light and dark.
(woman pauses in thought)
Bartender: Here, honey. Try the light. It's kind of like a cosmo.
--McSorley's, Bowery & 7th
Via Overheard in New York
Bartender: We don't serve cosmos here.
Well-dressed bridge & tunnel young girl: Fine, I'll have a gin and tonic.
Bartender: We've got two types of beer. Light and dark.
(woman pauses in thought)
Bartender: Here, honey. Try the light. It's kind of like a cosmo.
--McSorley's, Bowery & 7th
Via Overheard in New York
man, if i had a nickle...
Dingbat CSR, answering phone while eating at desk: Mmmmfff... I apologize, sir, I have nuts in my mouth.
Castle Rock, Colorado
Via Overheard in the office
Castle Rock, Colorado
Via Overheard in the office
The inspiration for "Being John Malkovich"
Worker #1: Did you know there was a midget in our building?
Worker #2: Hiding?
Worker #1: No, working on three, asshole.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
yeah, i need to live there
Customer: I'll have an egg omelet.
Cook: An egg omelet?
Customer: Yeah, one made with eggs.
Cook: Thank god you mentioned eggs. I was about to give you an omelet solely made from butter!
--Grant's Restaurant
Via Overheard in New York
Cook: An egg omelet?
Customer: Yeah, one made with eggs.
Cook: Thank god you mentioned eggs. I was about to give you an omelet solely made from butter!
--Grant's Restaurant
Via Overheard in New York
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Sunday, October 5, 2008
I've done HR and hiring
this stuff happens all the time...
Interviewer: How do you feel about ambiguity?
Interviewee: Can you be more specific?
via Overheard In The Office
Interviewer: How do you feel about ambiguity?
Interviewee: Can you be more specific?
via Overheard In The Office
i nearly sprayed coffee on my monitor
France's President Sarkozy, shown here meeting with Emperor Palpatine, is pursued by Toulouse Lautrec.
Picture and caption stolen completely from Photoshop Disasters
Saturday, October 4, 2008
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