Tuesday, October 30, 2007

The 10 Most Terrifyingly Inspirational '80s Songs

#10 - "The Final Countdown" by Europe



The synthesizer riff in this 1986 track is as fist-pumping as music gets without involving an actual instrument. We're not clear on what he's counting down to, but somebody's about to get their ass kicked. If we were wrestlers and it was 1986 again, we'd totally have this as our intro music.

The Only Way It Could Be Better:
The song takes a sharp decline after the chorus, when it slips from the vaguely threatening line "It's the final countdown!" into sci-fi-gibberish wails like "we're heading for Venus, and still we'll stand tall!"



"The Final Countdown" needs some serious trimming. If a remix were to come out that consists only of that synthesizer riff and the cry of "It's the final countdown!," it would doubtlessly rank higher on this list. But, hey, it's European. Just be grateful it's not about scat fetishes and exceedingly thin cigarettes.

Also, let's face it. That distinctly '80s synthesizer sound didn't exactly age well. Those too young to remember the Cold War, in fact, tend to laugh upon hearing it.

Best Things to Do While Listening:
Any activity which may seem like a good idea initially, but soon becomes completely ridiculous. May we suggest Ultimate Frisbee, riding a pocket bike or watching the second season of Lost.

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