Is It Hot in Here, or Is It You, Wednesday One-Liners?

I gotta try these sometime...

 

Man to scantily clad girl passerby: Yo, can I get your number? Can I text message you? Can I e-mail you? Somethin'? [As she walks away] Can I be your socks?

--Times Square

Overheard by: Nicole

 

70-year-old man to 20-something jogger: Good morning. Would you like to wrestle in the grass over there?

--Riverside Park

 

from Overheard in New York

Sing along...

I always feel like... somebody's watching me....

man, if i had a dime...

the proud, the few

Bored cop on megaphone: Please walk on the sidewalk. Stop walking in the middle of the street... Stop walking in the middle of the street. Use the sidewalks... See how you're on the black pavement? You want to be on concrete. See the cars trying to run you over? That's 'vehicular traffic.' Get out of its way.

--Next to Radio City Music Hall

 

from Overheard in New York

Three models banned from Madrid fashion week for being 'too skinny'

"Three models have been banned from Madrid fashion week for being too thin.

They were sent home after doctors weighed and measured all 70 of the girls taking part.

The show, which started yesterday, bars models with a Body Mass Index of less than 18, believing that they set an unhealthy example for teenage girls."

More from the Daily Mail

Several years ago, I told Pamela that the tide was turning on this kind of stuff. And I'm glad to know that I was right. Every time something like this happens, it helps reset the expectations and the standard of beauty.

But Paris Hilton's not on the list...

7 Amazing Holes

um, ouch?

This baby elephant has been rescued – by the nose – moments after his mother apparently tried to crush and drown him. The drama took place just seconds after the baby was born in a zoo. Pori, a 26-year-old African elephant, shocked onlookers by appearing to stamp on her new son. She then began rolling him in her enclosure before putting him in water, in an apparent attempt to drown him. Visitors at Friedrichsfelde Animal Park in Berlin screamed to alert keepers, who lured Pori away from her child with bread and apples. Members of the public then pulled the baby out of the water to safety. He was given a tranquilliser and painkillers. Amazingly, the baby was later reunited with his mother by zoo staff who said she had not been trying to kill him after all. Although the mother killed her first baby in 2005 by accidentally crushing him, keepers think her behaviour yesterday was down to a failed bid to make the calf stand up. Elephants usually nudge their young to help them take their first steps. Claus Pohle, deputy director of the zoo, said: "It only looked like she wanted to stomp him. All is well with Pori and her son. She is a proud and loving mother."

end of the world?

Amazing moment the world's biggest Christ was struck by lightning

This amazing photograph gives whole new meaning to the phrase "May God strike me with lightning if ..."

Rio de Janeiro's world-famous statue of Christ the Redeemer was struck by lightning during a thunderstorm over the Brazilian city on Sunday.
The statue - which towers over the city as the largest statue of Christ in the world - did not appear too damaged after the strike, according to Brazilian reports.

The statue stands 39.6 metres (130ft) tall, is made of 700 tons of reinforced concrete, and is located at the peak of the 700-metre (2,296ft) Corcovado mountain overlooking the city.

It was named one of the new Seven Wonders of the World in 2007.

Sunday's lightning storm felled trees and wreaked havoc in several Rio neighbourhoods.

Via Cellar Image Of The Day

Russian Stacking Frogs

She sure does love her lamb!

Stopped Time

From World. Photos.

You and me and me and you

Kids Know Something Adults Usually Forget

Little boy, pointing at two midget passersby: Whoa! Mom, look! That is so cool!
Midgets: Haha, dude, that little boy is awesome!

--1221 Rockefeller Center

Overheard by: Sellout In A Suit

 

from Overheard in New York

 

Really bad Olan Mills / Sears Portraits

Just go. You know you want to.

the fountain of my people

Amen, brother

Young man, about entirely light-blue painting behind glass: What is this? What the heck is this, anyway?
Mother: It's saying something.
Young man: What's it saying?
Mother: It's saying, 'I'm an extra mirror. I'm here if you need me.'
 

from Overheard in New York
 

Virtual Hip and Knee replacement

The animations, created by Edheads.org, are interactive and well-done. According to the FAQ page, Edheads is a non-profit organization, which creates educational web experiences that are free to teachers, students and parents.

Virtual Hip Replacement & Virtual Knee Surgery

no child left behind

You Should Never Dick around with Your Health

Girl buying coffee, coughing: I hate this throat. It's a piece of shit!
Guy buying Red Bull: You know what helps with that?
Girl: Please don't say 'cock' again.
Guy, flustered and laughing: What I was going to say was 'cough syrup.'
Male cashier, laughing: $8.98's your change.

--Christopher St

 

via Overheard in New York

Seal. Not the singer...

More cold...

LG Philips reveals 14.3-inch flexible e-paper for CES 2008

Someday we’ll be able to see moving pictures on our daily newspapers, thanks to this upcoming flexible e-paper from LG Philips. LG Philips reveals some cool 14.3-inch flexible e-paper for CES 2008 that are 300 micrometers thick, with full 180° viewing angle.

From The Gadget Blog

"A handy handbook"

Carreer day gone horribly wrong...

A Very Limited Edition Reese's Cup

Chick: Can you pass the penis butter?
Boss: [Silence.]
Chick: Peanut butter. Oh, God.

Cornwall
United Kingdom

Overheard by: monk.e.boy

 

from Overheard in the Office

Yes, We Can.

That I Would Be Good - Alanis

Shamelessly ganked from Creamy Nougat Lair

The Ice Hotel

The entire Icehotel is on loan from the mighty Torne River and is a place where time stands still. Just a short period before, fish swam in the water and the river was a crashing torrent of whitewater, wild and frothing. And very soon, when the spring comes and then finally the summer, the rooms, the suites, the bar, the reception, in fact the entire creation, will once again become part of the rushing rapids coursing toward the sea.

More here

That's your answer to everything

Programmer: Okay, so he asked us for a digital signature solution to document tracking and approval... Ideas?
Analyst: What if we got a couple midgets, and bought a few Etch A Sketches...?

1932 Wildcat Canyon Road
San Diego, California

From Overheard in the Office

Yadda Yadda Yadda, 24-Hours Later I'm in the ER with Poultry Up My Rectum

Lawyer #1: I had a bad dream last night. I woke my wife up at 4:30 to tell her I dreamt she was having sex with a gay man.
Lawyer #2: Oh, really?
Lawyer #1: Yeah, and it really upset me. And she laughed and said she knew why I had the dream. It was because of these women's sex discussion groups she's been going to lately. Then she says to me, 'Well, what was I doing? Using the drumstick or what?'
Lawyer #2: What the hell? The drumstick? What was she talkin' about?
Lawyer #1: I know -- I didn't get it either, so I asked her, 'What are you talking about?' and she said, 'Well, how exactly was I having sex with a game hen?'
Lawyer #2: [Guffaws.]
Lawyer #1, chuckling: Yeah... I guess she wasn't fully awake when I told her.

560 Mission Street
San Francisco, California

 

From Overheard in New York